What is a skill?
In simple words, the ability to do
something well, with computer skills you can surf the internet, you
searched for this article, you can read it, maybe make notes of it, you know
what all you can do with a computer.
Leadership skills, interpersonal skills, farming skills, cooking skills,
strumming the guitar well skills and so on. We need these skills to perform
effectively in so many works. Is there a skill to use our brains effectively?
Yes, there are and the most important would be meditation.
In this fast paced,
cut-throat world meditation is undoubtedly the single most skill to learn.
There are so many articles, blogs, videos on technical skills and the amazing
things technology can and is doing. Now, we humans have a highly developed,
advanced ‘computer’ system in the form of our brain. It’s because of this brain
that all these advancements have happened, me writing this on an electronic
device and you reading it miles apart from me is a mere example of the
technological advancement. We have gone into the space, understood the atom and
created what-not’s.
But have you noticed that despite all these modern gadgets,
space journeys we have never been more a miserable as a species. Look at the
all the studies and surveys on the percentage of people on anti-depressants,
people killing self and you would be surprised to see that data that point out
that a lot of young people take the drastic step of taking their lives. Just
look at people working in corporate sector, people around you, how many of them
have stress, anxiety and depression? Quite a few, right? Look at the violent
crimes, homicides, road rage cases, it’s all happening. Why is it that we can
do almost everything and yet we suffer?
Is it that the source of all these advancements is also the
source of our suffering? Let’s examine our brain, it’s unique isn’t it?
How are emotions related to our brains?
We have a part of our brain called the ‘prefrontal cortex’
which is more advanced more developed than any other species. It stores information and controls our working
memory, planning, problem solving, attention, reasoning etc. It’s because of
this brain that we are not subject to the whims and fancies of the natural
environment that we can pause we can think we can contemplate the future. This
brain is a virtual reality machine; you can actually contemplate multiple
realities and decide what you want to do in your life. And that’s how as a
species we have been able to do so much better than any other species, we are
on top of the food chain, not because we are the strongest we are the fastest
but because of this unbelievable brain. Interestingly, we can be at many places
in our minds simultaneously, we can be sitting at a dinner hosted by relatives
and we may be at our lover’s place in our minds, or maybe playing a movie in
our heads. The brain is always buzzing, what is happening, what is the story,
the thing happening right now do I want to be here or may be somewhere else.
And it is this part of the brain that basically compares our lives, our job,
and our love-life and so on. We get a new job, we get novelty then the
comparison, dissatisfaction, then I want that promotion, I got it, again
novelty, time goes by again comparison and dissatisfaction. It’s never ending.
But, does the brain work for our happiness, our fulfillment? I doubt that! It’s
just interested in my survival and my feeling significant. This part of the
brain gives you awareness and it makes us know that we are born that we are
here for a limited time and that we are going to die. Such a remarkable almost terrible
predicament for us as human beings, isn’t it? And I don’t think other animal
species is subject to that kind of awareness. What about them? They are always
in the present moment.
What is the function of ‘Amygdala’?
Now, there is another part in our brain, deep inside, the
‘Amygdala’. This part of the brain is probably responsible for us being alive.
How? Well, if amygdala was not there then we would have absolutely no
fear. Imagine, having no fear, no fear
of snakes, fire, guns, bombs, robbers! Someone with a non-functional amygdala
is walking the street, a robber points a gun at them and they feel absolutely
no fear. They just look at the robber, or maybe even ignore them. Frankly speaking,
I think the robber (with a functional amygdala) will get scared!!! So, fear is
important, for survival, it keeps us alive from snake biting us, to us getting
harmed by fire or the gunshot or whatever. If we were also still roaming in the
forest, like our ancestors, what would be our instinct on seeing a lion? We would
run away, run as fast as we could, isn’t it? Or maybe, we would fight. Just two
options! The threat is to my physical self, I have to respond to that only. But,
now, in this advanced world, where we are safe in our houses, no-one can barge
into it easily. So we are safe physically. So, the brain is guarding us from so
many other things, in addition to survival. So, the amygdala is protecting our
identity, our emotional self. You are in your office; your boss looks at you
with not so pleasing expressions, the amygdala sparks of, there is a sense of
fear. You are calling someone, they are not picking the phone, one time ok, second
time ok, third time, fourth time, well the amygdala starts, fear!!
We live in the world of beliefs. You are reading this
article, you are in this world and you are also in the world of your beliefs in
your head. And that world in your head is what you are trying to preserve more
than as much as your physical self. We are the only species that will kill for
our beliefs and die for our beliefs. So, we are striving to hold on to those
beliefs, those thoughts, and those images that we have in our minds. For example,
I have thought about a future situation in my mind, so this is how I is going to
happen, this will be the outcome, this is how it will look like, all planned
all imagined. But, it turns out some other way. What happens? That image, that
belief shook, and that’s why I will get upset. A lot of us have heard the metaphor
of ‘river’ to our lives. Go with the flow, let it be, let it flow, don’t
channel it and so on. For life, we want it to be this way, we compartmentalize
it, may be blocking it. If it happens the way we have imagined its awesome, great,
and we want to cling to the good thing because we are scared to lose it. And if
it doesn’t happen the way we wanted we try to run away from it. We saw
delicious fruits we collected all the fruits, we ate as much as we could, we
hoarded it and we saw a bear and we ran for our lives. Clinging and running
away! So, we are not experiencing the moment, we are experiencing the beliefs,
the desires, the dreams that we wished for. We are continuously juggling
between past and future defending our beliefs. Its and insane way to live, isn’t
it? And we are living it, the world that we created.
Take a look at the social media. It’s so much about the external,
how you look like, what brands or things you have, all these are more important
than how you feel. When you upload a photo, it’s about the look, the clothes
and not about how you feel internally. There are so many happy pictures on Facebook
and Instagram but are all of them really that ecstatic internally too? And many
times, people are not even aware of how they feel internally because they are
so invested to look a certain way externally. It’s not about how we feel.
So, what is Meditation?
Meditation is a way of
gaining control over this unbelievably complex brain. It’s an extremely important
skill, but nobody taught us in school. We were given plenty of information, fed
it to our brains, but nobody told us how to use the brain. Imagine the brain as
a sharp object. It can cut, dissect, but we do not know how to use it. And above
all, that it should be under our control. If I have a knife, for example, and I
can’t control it so it keeps stabbing me here and there, hurts me and I am like,
God my life is so painful unaware that the sharp object (my brain) might be
inflicting that pain. So, meditation means to understand and be aware of that
sharp thing, our brain and understanding the importance of it being under our
control. If I don’t know how to use my mind, my mind will use me.
Meditation is absolutely the right way to take control of
your brain and there is plenty of evidence that it does just that. It balances
the prefrontal cortex, reduces the activity of the amygdala balances the left
and right hemisphere, and controls the blood pressure. It improves the immune system; there are
plenty of studies examining that. In addition to the physical effects, it gives
us an insight of ourselves, about who we really are, what we desire and how to
manage those desires. So, we don’t live in constant stress and anxiety. It gives
us the control to use our brain to think about past and future when we have to,
pause the thoughts, to observe the happenings around us and to get that stillness,
connecting to that stillness and carrying that calm, that stillness wherever we
go.
There are many techniques of mediation. You will find many
guided tutorials in literature and videos, and trainers and Gurus who teach us
that. I will mention a very simple technique, the one that I started with and
continue to do even today. My Yoga Guru taught me this method. We are going to
observe our breath, because breathing is the only function, the only bodily
function that is both under our conscious as well as unconscious control. So
the same part of the brain that manages our blood pressure, our heart rate, our
digestive system, also manages our breathing. We don’t have to think about breathing. But,
if you observe, breathing is linked to our emotions. When we are relaxed the
breathing if flowing, easy, when we are stressed its tight, when we are angry
it’s shallow and short, isn’t it? So our
breath is connected to the unconscious part of the brain, in the part of the
brain that is determining our sense of mood, our sense of self, our emotions, now breathing gives us the
opportunity to connect with that unconscious part of the brain. So in this
practice, as we witness the breath we are going to be using our conscious brain
to watch and witness our breath which means we are using our conscious brain to
witness the workings of your unconscious mind. Isn’t that amazing?
How to meditate? A
simple and easy technique!
So take a deep breath, breathe in through your nose and breathe
out through your mouth. Go ahead and make a sighing sound, loud that you can
hear when you breathe out. Now allow your breathing to return to your natural rhythms
again, breathing through your nose. Gently close your eyes and bring your
attention to all the sounds around you. There are so many sounds and it’s
interesting because there is the sound and there is the interpretation of the
sound, how we perceive that sound, what thoughts or emotions those sound create
in our mind. What we need to do is to let go of that perception, let go of
attaching an emotion to that sound. Just the sound, nothing attached to it. Don’t
try to find a meaning to that sound, just the texture of that sound.
Now pay attention to your breath, and just notice and
observe how your body is moving with each breath. You don’t try to breathe, you
don’t initiate the breath, don’t’ hold on to your breath. Just notice, as your
body breathes in your abdomen goes upwards and outwards, and as your body
breathes out your abdomen falls, relaxes, just rest your mind on that movement
of the abdomen, and experience the sensations. That’s it. Do it for as long as
you can do easily. The idea is not to force you to do it. In the beginning, the
mind will wander off in seconds, thoughts and emotions will take over in a jiffy.
But, doing it consistently, that stillness will increase. We need to remember one
thing; it’s not possible to develop a skill in one attempt, unless we are
gifted. And even if we are gifted with a certain skill, we need to practice it to
do it improve it. So, make it a part of your daily routine, anytime, before
starting your day, before sleeping, when you are in a quiet undisturbed space. Not
only will it make you more relaxed, it will help you master your mind, master
your brain, and live a life of happiness and peace.
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